Cursed

Cursed is woman.  Cursed by God.  Cursed by herself.  Cursed by everyone around her.  A facade, a facade, all is a facade.  Nothing is reality.  All is another's perception.  Who am I to you?  Who do you need me to be?  There is no room for me.  I am irrelevant.  Irrelevancy defines me, cursed as I am.  My reality is of no consequence.  You know me when I do not.  Who do you say that I am?  It is all of me.  Cursed.  Emotions threaten my damn.  Billows of waves incessantly barrage me.  Waves I can not suppress.  The beauty of them is lost.  I dare not relent, lest I drown.  Drown myself.  Curse myself.  Breathing is irrelevant.  It benefits no one in this cursed land.  This cursed state of being.  Perhaps I shall plunge in.  How bad can drowning be?  Perhaps this curse would be absolved.  If only I were worth sacrificing.  But who wants a tainted offering?  The cloak of the curse spoils the good.  Woman is cursed.  The entire lot of us.  Cursed, we rip at each other's flesh.  Struggling, we drown each other.  We all become oblivious.  Worthless.  Cursed.  Our true selves become irrelevant.  Perhaps irrelevancy is truly who we are.  Cursed is woman.  Cursed, everyone.  In our cursed world honesty is merely a perception.  A hall of mirrors reveals our truth.  I once heard that truth was in the armory of God but here it is only used a the talon with which we rip each other apart.  My breast is open and bleeding.  Shreds of flesh litter my feet.  I realize the threatening waters are composed of my own tears.  Those not shed exceeding any barriers.  Cursed woman.  I plunge in.  I have decided to drown.  I go down to the depths of the earth.  The waters close in around me.  All is dark.  I relent to the drowning.  Moments pass.  Moments that are as hours.  I can not breathe.  Fear envelopes me.  What have I done?  I shall die cursed.  Moments. Moments.  Darkness.  Nothing.  My heart stops.  All is calm.  All is at rest.  I see the sun.  How can that be?  How can I, having drowned see at all?  There are no more waters.  I am free.  Absolved.  Free.  I lift my head, my weary arms follow.  I touch my breast.  Scars.  Scars healed.  Sacrifice accepted.  Curse absolved.  My worth, insufficient.  Covered by another.  Absolution from curse.  Woman, once again.